A Warning from a Man Concerned About the Women in His Life

I have a lot of thoughts about consent. I'm a man who tries his best to create an environment where consent can be discussed openly and freely. I don't get the women I like drunk just so they'll sleep with me. I don't take advantage of potential sexual partners. I don't act unless both parties are of sound mind and are able to consent. I'm not a hero for that. That's just basic human decency. 

My submission isn't going to be about all of that. The more urgent thing to discuss is the safety of the women in this country. On my campus, there has been a spike in reports of sexual assault, rape, and sexual harassment since the election. It's like the success of the next president justifies every misogynistic thought and urge the men around me have been suppressing. The election of trump validated the already prevalent violence against women on my campus.

To the women who are reading this: I'm sorry that I have to say what I'm about to say. For your safety, please be extra careful. If you're like me and live in the south, be extra extra careful. I would never blame a victim, ever. But to stay safe, I hope you'll consider staying in groups of people you trust, avoid being out alone at night, avoid parties where your consent could be potentially violated. 

There are men in this world who hold consent as extremely important. There are men out there who will love you without guilting you into things you are not comfortable with. There are men in this country that would do anything to make you feel safe here. 

As one of those men, I'm sorry that this is how things are for the time being. Things will get better. Until they do, please stay safe.